Christianity Explained
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Talking with God
Picture, Hand in a Cloud
Talking with God is more usually called 'prayer'. It involves offering God our deference as well as asking for his guidance and support for ourselves and for others. As well as talking to God, it's important to leave times of quiet to listen for an answer, God talking to us, it should be a two-way communication. (Return to top)

It serves a very important purpose, it allows us to build a relationship with God which strengthens our life as well as our faith. If you don't talk with someone, how can you build a relationship with them? (Return to top)
Frequently Asked Questions
Building A Relationship With God
Are there any people in your life with whom you have little to do - eg: people you see regularly (at work or in church for instance) but about whom you know very little?

Can that be because you don’t make time, or don't have any reason to speak with them.

Conversely, do you meet and speak regularly with those you're close to? (Return to top)
  

Picture of Friends
You may be aware of other people who live near you... but about whom you know little or nothing because you never have anything to do with them. The best way to get to know someone is to meet with them regularly and to talk with them - it's the same with God. (Return to top)

If you're not very aware of God in your life, it may be because you don't often communicate with him, so it's not surprising if you feel that relationship isn't very deep. We need to grow our personal relationship with God because, as that relationship grows, so does our belief. We do that by talking with him in prayer - 'prayer' means to 'entreat', 'plead' or 'ask'. (Return to top)

 

What is Prayer?
We don’t need to use any special words. God already knows our inmost thoughts, but he wants us to ask.

We can say words, either spoken aloud or in our mind, or we can be silent with a blank mind, or we can concentrate just on the single topic we want to pray for. (Return to top)		  

Picture, Person Praying
Basically it's just talking with God. Prayer takes many different forms. The simplest is probably a type known as Arrow Prayer which we 'shoot' at God, especially in a time of need – the shortest is probably 'Help!' Other forms are described in the last section below. (Return to top)

'Personal Prayer' is praying by ourselves; 'Public Prayer' is praying with others in a group; and 'Intercession' is interceding - praying on behalf of others, such as when we ask for help in the release of a hostage or healing for a sick person. (Return to top)
Making Time In A Busy Life
Overhearing people talking about their problems as they use their mobile phone can trigger your prayer for them.

It’s good to make free time occasionally when we can concentrate only on prayer without distraction.

You may like to keep a pad by you to write down things that intrude into your mind whilst praying, so you can deal with them later and forget them for now. (Return to top)		  

Picture, Praying on Train
How can I pray in a busy life? The question is probably better phrased as 'Where' can I pray in a busy life, rather than 'How' - the answer is anywhere. Some will advise you to have a special 'prayer place' such as a bench in the garden or park, or a familiar seat in the lounge or church. That can be good, but it's not essential. You can pray about items as you read about them in a newspaper, or while doing a dull task - some pray for those around them like fellow passengers, or while doing a task they find boring – like ironing! (Return to top)

But it's good to make a special time for prayer too, when we can concentrate on prayer – and listen for God's answer; eg: when you go to bed, recall and give thanks for the events of that day, or just before you get up ask God's help for the day ahead. (Return to top)
What Am I Going To Say?
Remember not just to say, "We pray for this" or "We pray for that", eg: we pray for our school. That’s OK, it introduces the topic, especially if you’re praying with others, but it doesn't’t actually say what you want.

Give thanks for, or ask for, things specifically; eg: "We give thanks for the work of the teachers", or "We pray for John who's ill, that he may know your peace." (Return to top)		  

Picture of Mouth Speaking
Don't worry about what to say. Jesus prayed regularly to guide his life, but his disciples had to ask him how to pray. Jesus advised, "Don’t keep babbling on like pagans, for they think they'll be heard because of their many words." (Mat 6:7). He went on to teach them his concise "Lord’s Prayer." Leave some quiet time to allow God to give you an answer - you may 'hear' his solution to your problem, perhaps as an idea, or you may realise that it's gone away. (Return to top

God sees into our hearts and minds and knows what we want before we ask for it (Mat 6:8), but we need to ask, so as to acknowledge him, in the same way that parents expect their children to ask and not expect it just to be given automatically. (Return to top

Don't worry if the words you use seem naive, everyone starts at the beginning and you'll get better the more you do it. (Return to top)
Chicken And Egg
Does God always answer prayer? Yes, but it may not be what we expect. It could be 'Yes' or 'No' or 'Later', and it may take a different form from what we asked for, so it's hard to recognise when it happens.

God really does know what's best for us. If you ask for something selfish or impossible, don’t be surprised if the answer's 'No'! (Return to top)		  

Picture, chicken and Egg
Which comes first, belief in God, or going regularly to church and praying (Belief and Belonging or Belonging and Belief)? It used to be thought that people believed first then went to church, but now it's recognised that for many, going to church and mixing regularly with other Christians often comes first as we seek to find God. (Return to top)

A deep relationship with God can take a long time to develop, mixing regular with others and praying are important parts of that seeking, both help belief to grow; but like any exercise, we need to do it regularly. (Return to top)

Don't worry if you feel others are better at it than you. They may be feeling just as unsure, or they may have been at it longer and already been blessed with the deeper faith you're still working at. (Return to top)
Forms Of Prayer
Formal prayers: are written by others for us to use too. You can find these online or in books of prayer.

Grace: A prayer of thanks before or after a meal.

Contemplation: Emptying the mind to let God in.

Meditation: Concentrating on a word, passage, or object to aid our focus on God.

Examen: An ancient method of reviewing the day to help you recall and give thanks for each event. (Return to top)		  

Picture, Book Of Prayers
There are many different ways of praying. Some people who find one way helpful for them may encourage you to adopt it for yourself too, but it's best to find what works for you, and that could even be different ways at different times. (Return to top)

At its simplest, we can just speak with God in a conversational way using words we make up, much as we would with anyone else, or we can use formal prayers others have already written. (Return to top)

Don't forget to leave periods of quiet so God can suggest an answer or plant an idea to direct your actions as best for you. (Return to top)

A useful help in forming our prayers is the acronym ACTS – Adoration: giving God praise for who he is. Confession: saying sorry for what we've done wrong.... or left undone. Thanksgiving: saying thanks for what we've already received. Supplication: asking for what we need for ourselves and for others. (Return to top)